Ha Zaa

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The Rants and Raves of a slightly neurotic, overly analytical, sometimes contradicting, and self procclaimed artist.

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Thursday, May 7, 2009

Ive been thinking lately, about how the decisions you make now are supposed to sustain you for the rest of your frickin life. how fair is that?

i have to pick what job i want when im 18. ya i know A LOT when im 18. then i have to pick a spouse at like 25. im sure when im 40 ill be sooooooo impressed with my 25 year old knowledge. then soon after you are required to have children and raise them correctly. well, if you're in your twenties then clearly you're qualified with enough life experience to be morally, emotionally and financially responsible for mutliple lives. CLEARLY.

sometimes i feel that the best i can do is whats best for me now. worrying about forever is going to get no where because well, ill be different in 10 years, in 5 years, in 20 minutes. it will be a hole of circular logic.

how is it that the very experiences that give us experience are brought on by decisions made my naive inexperienced hoo-ha's. and yes i just made up that word.
for instance, people in their 40s that have overcome adversity, raised a family against odds, changed careers 4 times . . finally finding their bliss . . . seem like they have life experience, excellent advice, and a decent sense of contentment in their lives
people in their 40s with no kids, living like bachelors, overcoming few obstacles, working at a dead-end job with no motivation or energy to change paths . . well you wouldn't necessarily go to them for life advice.
sometimes it seems making mistakes in life is the only thing that keeps me together and hopeful for the future -

it's not even a little bit comforting that everyone else is in the same boat too.